Just a few thoughts while at home

A Little Background of Why I'm Here

Just as a clause to why I'm even writing this. There are some people I know, and a lot of people I have read about that have amazing lives to which I could only aspire. My story is pretty mundane compared to those, but for those even reading this, it is what I know. The people I have met so far are amazing, and I hope to continue meeting people that not only I can call friends, but inspire me to keep traveling. So for the past ten years, in brief, here is my story.

When I was leaving Seattle, everybody kept telling me how jealous they were that I was going on this trip and how they wish they could do something like what I was doing. Now I have a few friends who have backpacked through Europe or taken trips to Southeast Asia and some who've even been down to South America and beyond. Hell, even my mom's been to Brazil. Me, well, I've been to Europe a couple of times, but mainly just Germany and Italy. I lived in Seattle for eight years and never even made it to Canada. That's only a two hour drive and for some reason I couldn't take a weekend and go visit Vancouver. I still haven't figured that one out, but that's a different story. I guess I figured that it was just time to do something different. You know, like in the movies when someone comes to the fork in the road, trying to decide which way will lead to their destination. Well I picked the opposite way. The one that would take me away from that destination. Granted, I have a home base in Germany with my brother and his wife, but I figure it's still a lot different path than I could've taken.

After college, or uni, as everyone else in the world calls it, I got a job in advertising. It was for a cluster of radio stations under the umbrella of the largest media corporation on the planet. I won't go into too much detail since I only worked there for six months, but it was awful. A market of 100,000 people with 10 salespeople for a lot of local business owners who get inundated with sales calls all day. Looking back, I can see why they would just shrug me off. Another kid, fresh out of school, trying to sell me some shit that I don't need. Don't get me wrong, radio is a great medium for advertising. But only if you have a catchy jingle (I'm lovin' it) or there's a monster truck rally coming up. Other than that, it doesn't really drive people to your weekday pizza buffet or make you buy a new heating and air conditioning unit because you heard that you can trust Mike for all of your heating and A/C needs. That kind of stuff is word of mouth and we knew it, and just like most other jobs out there, the upper ups were kind of assholes. Bottom line this, sales figures that. Not the best people skills in the world unless you were also an upper management person sipping whiskey on the golf course.

Six months in and I had had enough. I enjoyed the marketing analysis aspect of this job. I could run the figures for clients and tell them why the correlation between our listening audiences matched up with their business model, etc., etc. But did it work? Maybe. But like I said, I don't think small town Joe is going to rent a tractor from the blankety blank power equipment rental place because he heard an ad for it during his drive to work in the morning. I'm pretty sure he had more important things going through his head at that hour. Work, wife, kids, where am I going for lunch today (I heard about a sweet pizza buffet on the radio)? I just wasn't enjoying the work anymore and so I quit. I moved back home for a few months trying to find another line of work. That's when I sort of fell into retail management. I got a job at a sporting goods retailer, mainly just to start earning some money and fill my days. I did that job for awhile, moved in with an old friend (who happened to own a house down the street from my dad). I heard about an old acquaintence who lived in Seattle who wanted a roommate, and so I transferred up to Seattle with my job to move to the big city. I loved it right from the start. Whatever you want to do, whenever you wanted to do it. A complete 360 from small-town life to which I was accustomed. I found a job with another retailer which offered way more money and soon enough I was making a comfortable living, sharing a house in a large suburb with some friends. We were going out, living life, and having a great time. Then, the housemates started getting married, moving away and soon, I was the only one left out of the four. So I moved in with a good friend of mine from college for four years, and just plugged along at work. This is where life started taking a turn for me.

Now, my roommate Aaron is a great friend. I still call him frequently to see how married life is going. His wife is a doctor, he's a construction engineer for a home builder in Seattle. Needless to say, these guys are going to be okay. Over the past four years, however, my life just sort of became drab. Don't get me wrong. We had some great times. Concerts, sailing, occasionally going out to bars. It just seemed like life had slowed down. I wasn't in college anymore. I was getting older, in a dead-end job (no matter what they said about career advancement), and I wasn't going out and living the life that I wanted. After eight years of retail management, I finally started to wonder what else was out there. The good thing was that my roommate was getting married, got married (although his wife didn't live there yet, long story, some other time), and they were going to end up moving. This is the sort of kick in the ass that I needed to make a change.

So about two months before I moved out here, my brother and I were on the phone, and he mentioned something about moving out to Germany. I thought that sounded like a great idea. Quit my job, sell everything I own, and just move. Now, I had some things I wanted to do while I was there besides travel, but traveling was the main reason. To some people, this may seem brave (or so I was told), but honestly, I never really though about it at the time. When it really sunk in is when I sold my bed. Not only did I love that bed, but it was sort of the finale that told me that I was moving and when or if, I ever went back to the States, I wouldn't have a bed when I got there. Life is starting over. Everyone says you only get one go round in this life, but it sort of feels like this is round two. Let's get started.

Am I trying to 'find' myself, especially at this stage in life? To be honest, I thought that is sort of why people traveled. After six weeks of living here, I don't find that to be as true. This isn't a sappy Hollywood production of a thirty-something who became bored with life and just dropped it all to start over (although it's kind of what I did). I guess I was just never all that lost. I didn't need finding. I'm not that typical American dreamer who marries his high school sweetheart, goes to school, has 2.3 kids, buys a house, has a dog, and puts in 35 years with the same company for the rest of their lives. I'm sorry, but if I ever get a plaque and banquet signifying that much time at the same place, I'm going to be one sad old man. I don't have anything against the American dream for other people. Some people are very comfortable and quite happy with that life and that lifestyle. I'm just not one of them. I have a lot of friends who do this and they are perfectly happy. Great wife, kids, house, good job, friends, security. That sort of thing, for myself, just isn't compatible at this point in my life.

Since I've been traveling, I've seen a lot of people that have been doing this for years. They're getting out there, discovering, seeing, living. It seems as if they weren't happy with conventionalism as well. Young, old, my age, whatever. They're out there. Doing it. Some of them are even married and doing this thing called life together. I feel like I couldn't just work all year and do this a week at a time, three times a year. Yawn. Disneyland. Yawn. My kid just got potty trained update on Facebook. Yawn. Jesus, it's time to start living. Some of the people I've met so far absolutely fascinate me with their lifestyles. Working half the year to finance their travels for the other half. Now that sounds like living. It seems to me like the U.S. has their head on backwards as to what life is. People are defined by their work, not their friends, family, interests, hobbies, etc. They live to work, not the other way around, which is how it should be. These people, albeit some of them young, and not really experienced with the work force and the 'real world'. Well, maybe the 'real world' sucks. It certainly did for me. I can't imagine getting a 10, 15, 20 year pin for all those hours spent under fluorescent lighting dealing with shit that doesn't really matter to anyone anyway. So the company made a couple extra bucks because I spent an extra four hours at work today. Well, guess what? I'd rather give you the money and just have me go home and enjoy my life. It's sunny for Christ's sake, and we only get a couple weeks of that a year in Seattle. I'm ooouuuttttaaa here! Enjoy suckers!

There are millions of people doing what I am doing right now. Going against the norm, defying the American dream and kindly giving the bird to to the suburbs. However, since this is now my daily life, it sort of just feels like the norm. My norm. Sitting at the end of the bar making wisecracks Norm. Living over here doesn't feel out of the ordinary anymore. It may seem that way to my parents and my friends back home, but I sure don't feel any different. I actually want to make it last as long as I can. Explore more. See parts of the world that most people don't see. You know, go somewhere different for a week, live there and feel a little local. Just long enough to get comfortable, routine, and then go off again. Somewhere new, maybe relaxing this time. Not so many tourists. Whatever. Right now, it feels like I can do this anytime I want. And for now, I can. But soon, the money will run out and reality will slap me right in the face. It's a good thing that that's sort of the way I've become accustomed to dealing with things. When they're right in your grill begging to be dealt with because there is no other option. It's time to get a job. Shit.

So here we go. Whether I get a job, go back to the States to study, stay here and travel with my brother, who, by the way, is an amazing photographer, that has way more patience for a sunset than I would ever hope and way more ambition to get up for a sunset than I could ever dream. I guess, I just want to see all that life has to offer. Man wasn't meant to be confined. And I don't intend to be. Maybe I'll find a job that has me indoors for a few hours a day, but I'm sure as hell not going back to the life that once was. In my six short weeks here, I've met too many people that embrace life as it's meant to be. Meeting people, laughing, sharing stories, staying up way past a 32 year-old's bedtime, whatever. Not to sound sappy, but it's inspiring. I'm going to try my best to stay here and make the best of the time I have. Thank you to all the people I've met so far, and I can only imagine who I'm going to meet in the future. Thank you Nate and Dawn.